This is a short documentary about NYC in the fifties literary scene. It was before the entry of film or TV and of course not the Web. It's not that great, but it shows a time period that is interesting to anyone with a literary bent. The author is Dan Wakefield who moves from Indiana to New York to study at Columbia. It talks about the literary foment of talent during a time when New York became the center of the art world. Norman Mailer was a big influence and critical voice during these times. It talks about the culture of three martini lunches and Greenwich Village which was and perhaps still is the center of bohemian life in the States.
The film stirs in me memories of my time spent as a graduate student in Queens at SJU. It wasn't NYU and not Columbia but I empathize with Wakefields feelings of awe when he first went to Greenwich Village. I'm from Upstate which is not as far off as Indiana, but to a native New Yorker it might as well be. Anything west of the Hudson or North of the Tappen Zee is "hick" country to New Yorkers. I took the F train into Manhattan from Queens. It took about a half hour to reach Manhattan. I would watch the stops with nervous anticipation until it turned into Manhattan. It was another thirty minutes until the train reached West 4th street which was in the center of the West Village. I don't know how it was in Wakefield's time but I found myself spending more of my time in the East Village. It was wear the Indie movie theaters were and cheap eats could be had.
I remember the first time I went out in the Village. I was at a place called the Sullivan room which was an underground club that played techno music. I was trying to reach out to other influences that weren't to be found in Binghamton, Upstate where I was from. The music was loud and new. Certainly different from anything in Binghamton. I ended up really drunk on the F train back to Queens. When I left the club there were people all over the Village. To my surprise it had been the Gay Pride day in New York. It was quite an experience. One that I'll never forget.
That first semester of Grad school I almost didn't make it to the next semester. I had misplace a paper and received an incomplete as a grade. Luckily the department allowed me to resubmit the paper and I got an A. Also that first semester I lost it in front a professor and was almost thrown out of school. I had failed out of Law School and I had a lot of baggage from that experience. I was so crazy with the idea that I had to get a perfect GPA and become a professor that it drove with over the edge. Eventually I found my way into a counselor and extensive psychological counseling to deal with the stress of Grad school and my past which I just couldn't come to terms with. I graduated with honors and moved onto a degree in teaching which didn't work out for me. Now I'm studying screenwriting something that I've always wanted to do.
I feel I found my way to some degree. I'm getting a degree in writing which is what I've always wanted to do. From my earliest childhood memories I wanted to be a writer. Yet, I get so stressed that it won't work out. I fear I'll be homeless or bankrupt or unemployed all those years at university wasted with big debts. I think of going back to New York. But it's so expensive. And my father is older. He will turn 70 this year. I don't know what I'll do. It seems everyone I know has gotten on well, except me. It seems that everything I do is a failure. What have I done? Why go to school? Is it really necessary? I can't stand thinking all of this. Yet I can't get away from it.
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